God of Thunder and Rock'n'Roll (archmage) wrote,
God of Thunder and Rock'n'Roll

Only I

Yes, only I would make up a prayer to the Beard Gods, on the spot, off the top of my head. But hey, this is the kind of thing I do...just ask discordian. Neither of us will ever forget him calling upon me to give a sermon/blessing at his handfasting, lo these many years ago. I should note that not only did I not know or expect him to call upon Reverend Frank for this, Rev. Frank was 3 sheets to the wind at the time...and yet, it was sensational.

Anyway, I thought I'd share with you the comment I just made to gonzo_md, who, tragically, recently lost the use of his facial hair. Before you worry, he's doing fine, and we expect a full recovery soon.

archmage:I feel for you, m'man. Grow it back. I forgive you.

gonzo_md: the Beard Gods have not forsaken me after all?!

archmage: No, my son. They are always with you...do you not, even now, feel their influence? The tingle in your skin, as they grace your visage with new and coarser hair? Yay, so it is written in the Book of Barbisol, that even though a man shaveth, lo, the Gods shall grant him new growth, and in their generosity, it shall be even more fruitful than before.

Pray with me, Initiate:

The Beard is my shield, I shall not shiver.
It giveth me style upon my face,
It bringeth in the ladies and showeth mine True Age.
It taketh me past the Tenders of the Bar, who knoweth my desires, e'en as they look upon me.
Though a walk through the Valley of clean-shaven pretty-boys, I shall fear no loneliness,
For Thou art with me, o Beard.
Surely dash and flair shall shine from me for all the days of my life,
and I shall dwell in the house of the Barber. Amen.

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