God of Thunder and Rock'n'Roll (archmage) wrote,
God of Thunder and Rock'n'Roll
archmage

Ramblin' Gamblin' Mage: Day 2

Knowing I was gonna be here for 10 days, I really did not expect to already have what I will always refer to as The Total Texas Experience™. What is that, you ask? Well, over the course of the last 24 hours, I've spent half of it drinking, I've helped tear up a house, I've barbecued, I've seen multiple sets of fake breasts at a local honky-tonk, and I've been accosted by the police.

OK, so, the day started slow enough. Nice, relaxing. We made some breakfast and ran a few errands. While out, stopped by the liquor store to get some supplies, one of which was a hip bottle of black label Southern Comfort, which I proceeded to enjoy over the course of the day. Then, it was off to Doug's buddy's new house.

Now, it's new to him, but not a new place. The place needs a lot of work, but not as much as it first looks like. Frank (the friend, not me) and his wife, Jaime, have bought the place to fix up and resell, and we were going to help get some old appliances out. This turned into all the appliances coming out and then tearing up a floor, a piece of which was a serious pain in the ass. This particular piece did NOT want to come up, and it took four of us, in the end. This is, of course, after it had snapped down on Frank's foot, driving a nail through his toe...and then snapped down on Doug's steel-toed boot...and then snapped down on MY boot. Needless to say, getting rid of that bitch became a moral imperative.

So, back to Doug's to fire up the grill (sausages and pork chops), shower, and head out to the local bar. Now, we all know that I quit smoking a long time ago, so being in a smoke-filled bar was a little hard on my lungs, and the music being loud enough to make your ears bleed was crazy, but we got through it. It's not often...no, it's not ever...that I thought I'd be seeing middle-aged redneck women doing the Ghetto Grind to hip-hop music, and it will always be one of the funniest and most disturbing things that I've watched. Still, a good time was had, including Doug getting me to relive my days on stage by having them play "Mustang Sally," which, yes, I sang loud and proud. Evening ended by having fake breasts flashed at me, twice. Hey, don't bother laughing, the situation was funny but the tits weren't all that. ;)

So, we all head to IHOP for food, and eventually head for home. it's about 3 in the morning, by this point, and we're pulling up to the apartment when the tell-tale lights of the five-oh pop on behind us. Eh? Apparently, we have a license plate light out. OK, no big deal, right? They get Doug's ID (he was driving), then come and get mine and Felicia's. Odd, but OK. 20 minutes later, they finally come back to the car, make us all get out, frisk us, and search the car. Why? Apparently, with the old conviction on Doug's record, they felt the need and probable cause to do all this. Needless to say, this was very excessive, and also needless to say, there was nothing for them to find. They ended up giving us a warning, and letting us go.

Well, Doug has already been on the phone to the police station, and will be going down to talk to the Chief today; he was pissed. Amusingly enough, his cousin is mayor of the next town, and two of his uncles are judges in the area, so his family name gets recognized and respected. Doug has declared that I will be getting a written apology for this. I'm not needing it, but I'll openly admit that if i do, I'll frame that bitch and hang it in my house. What a great souvenir that would be. ;)

So, as we all get back to consciousness, we're planning to head back to Frank's place to do some more work, and probably barbecue some more. I smell food, and I'm starving. Y'all be good!
Subscribe

  • (no subject)

    Jim Jeffries On Why Other Countries Think US Gun Laws Are Crazy Pretty well sums it all up, as far as I'm concerned.

  • I Gotcher Free Inhabitant Status Right Here, Swingin'

    Holy cats...I've only just become aware of this "free inhabitant / article 4" bullshit. Watching some of the videos of these wingnuts is comedy gold,…

  • (no subject)

    First Biofluorescent Reptile Ever Discovered - Short article and links to further info. Biofluorescence is far from unknown, but we've never seen…

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

  • 11 comments

  • (no subject)

    Jim Jeffries On Why Other Countries Think US Gun Laws Are Crazy Pretty well sums it all up, as far as I'm concerned.

  • I Gotcher Free Inhabitant Status Right Here, Swingin'

    Holy cats...I've only just become aware of this "free inhabitant / article 4" bullshit. Watching some of the videos of these wingnuts is comedy gold,…

  • (no subject)

    First Biofluorescent Reptile Ever Discovered - Short article and links to further info. Biofluorescence is far from unknown, but we've never seen…