Missionaries. A pair of the white-shirted, black pants and ties, backpack-wearing young men that like to ride their bikes around and annoy random people with their blatherings about God.
Look, even on the best of days, this annoys the ever-lovin' fuck out of me. Buddhists don't come to my door. Muslims don't. Jews don't. Hare Krishna, Hindu, Shinto, Scientologist, Asatru, Secular Humanist, none of them come into my life to bother me and babble at me about how I should believe in the same Invisible Man In The Clouds as they do...but these guys (usually Mormons, sometimes Jehovah's Witnesses) gotta come bother me. No better than spam, in my opinion. And we all know what you do to spam, right? You delete it.
As I said, on a good day, I'm not amused by this intrusion into my life. And when you just woke me up? It is not considered to be a 'good day.'
I put on my best "why are you still breathing" expression and just stared at them, while they tried to maintain their sunny disposition. i really didn't feel like answering them much, until one of them asked if I had talked to missionaries like them before. I said that yes, I had, and I usually left them crying. The other said "I don't believe that." I threw back my head, laughed heartily, then leveled my gaze at him again and "You don't? That's fine, you don't have to believe. I certainly don't believe in your God." His buddy asked if I was religious, I replied that no, I was tired, and he should toddle on his merry way and take his useless sack of dumb ass with him...and that next time, I would spray them with the convenient hose that's right next to the door.
Fuck, now I'm awake, and my head hurts,and my mood is shot. Fucking wastes of good oxygen. Look, believe whatever makes you happy, I'll support your right to do so all the way, but the minute you come into my life and waste my time with this shit, you get my ire. I don't need your religious advertising.
