That's right, it's the return of the Grill Christ.
Today is Di's family reunion, which means I meet them all...and the grill is MINE to man. A little nervous? Sure. Adrenalized? You bet. These poor fools have Dinglenut cooking the last few years, and he burned everything. They don't know what hit them, not yet, but anyone who has had my grilling knows what they are in for.
Incidently, for those wondering about the mildly blasphemous name (not that you are surprised, I'm sure), my Dad is a master of the barbecue, and earned the nickname Grill God. He taught me, hence, I am Grill Christ.
1.In the Beginning, God said 'Let there be Fire.' 2.And there was Fire. And God looked and saw that it was Good. 3.And God told Man 'Take thee this Beast of the Field, and slaughter it, that thou mayest eat the Meat of it. 4.And Man cried out that the Meat was cold, 5.and God said unto him 'Place the Meat upon the Fire, that it mayest be cooked to thine liking.' 6.And Man placed the Meat upon the Fire, and Lo, he did Burn it to a Crisp.
7.God did throw up his Hands at this, and said 'Man, thou art a Fool.' 8.And He said unto Goddess 'See what you can do with him, I'm Tired.' 9.And Goddess said 'Let there be the Grill', 10.And God said 'Hey, not Bad.'
11.And God did send his first-born Son to the Firmament of Earth, charging him with showing Man how to cook his Meat in the proper Way. 12.And the Grill Christ did come to Man, saying 'Stand back, and watch closely.' 13.And the Grill Christ did cook the flesh of the Beasts of the Field, and the Birds of the Air, and the Fish of the Sea, all while drinking Cola and smoking Cloves. 14.And Man did partake of the cooked Meats, and Lo, there was much rejoicing.
15.And God looked upon the glory of his Son's majesty, and said 'Let this be known forever as the Barbecue, and let all take heed, and do this in Remembrance of Him.' 16.And the Grill Christ did settle back in his chair, 17.And basked in the glow of their praise, all while munching the best damn cheeseburger he had ever made and drinking a bottle of Honey Mead. 18.Amen.
In all seriousness, the grilling went great. Two huge pans of chicken parts, another huge pan of marinaded steaks, couple packs of hot dogs, a couple of massive Steelhead fillets, and 10 pounds of hamburgers...I was at that grill for quite a while. However, the food was downright scarfed, and I had many coming up to me to compliment it. I guess it was nice to have their food flavorful and juicy, instead of burnt. Even the picky eaters loved it, so, needless to say, i felt like a million.
On top of that, I made a contact for a (very) potential graphics job in the future, and made good first impressions on the extended family...always a plus. And now I shall relax with some Mountain Dew and a smoke, and a movie, and bask in the glow of being the Grillmaster that I am.