October 3rd, 2002

Typing

(no subject)

Basement Of The Cairo Museum To Be Opened -- Initial forays show items that have never been identified, and some likely have been here for decades. Egypt's director of the Supreme Council of Antiquities tried and FAILED to find pieces he sent here in the mid 70's, when he was an archaeologist

Legendary Viking Longhouse Discovered -- Archaeologists believe it to be the home of Snorri Thorfinnsson, thought to be the first European born in the New World. The site was found by information in the Viking sagas, which have been shown to have been right and accurate more than once.

Blue Senate Candidate -- Yes, he's BLUE. After taking colloidal silver (for fear of Y2K antibiotic shortages), he developed argyria, and that's permanent. Hey, I'd vote for him...you KNOW he won't discriminate based on color.

World's Largest Radio Telescope -- Using radio telescope dishes in Spain, Arizona, Finland, and Chile, scientists have effectively created a radio telescope with a diameter that of Earth.

World's Funniest Joke-- If you know me, you know I love to laugh...and I love to make others laugh. I've always said that laughter is universal, and that if someone doesn't have a smile, give 'em one of yours. Well, if you are curious as to the best way to do this, you should read this article. Actually, I was impressed with the work that went into this, and at the 'statistics' shown later on.

And, dammit, I love that joke.
Typing

One Last Set Of Movies...For Now

You know the pause won't last long, but that's OK. FIrst off, they have released a 2-DVD set of "Near Dark". If you've never seen this, we're talking one of the original good vampire movies of the modern age. Lance Henriksen and Bill Paxton are wonderful in it, and it's a fun movie, even if the end is a tad cheesy. That's just the movie nut in me coming out...take it or leave it.

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There's 2-1/2 hours of my life I won't be getting back.
Typing

Pluses And Minuses

Plus Side: it's a beautifully dark and rainy day

Minus Side: my internet connection is slow as fuck, IM kept dropping me, and I got word from my first client today...WITH MORE STUPID CHANGES TO MAKE. And I still need to get more preliminaries for the second one. *sigh*

A new t-shirt I have to have made:
CHEST WOUNDS SUCK
when properly inflicted
Typing

Match Of The Day

(*many thanks to kespernorth for the best laugh I've had in days*)

http://abcnews.go.com/wire/World/ap20021003_1203.html

An Iraqi vice-president has suggested that instead of going to war, Presidents Bush and Hussein should hold a duel instead to decide the outcome of the conflict, saving the American and Iraqi peoples the expense and suffering of a real war. I think this is a brilliant idea; I've always been sad that dueling went out of fashion. I got to thinking, though, about what would have happened if all previous conflicts in American history had been decided by duels, rather than battles. Here's a small sampling:

THE MATCH: The Founding Fathers VERSUS King George III, Rex Britannia
THE PLAY: King George is ambushed on his way to the dueling grounds by revolutionary soldiers who, for some inexplicable reason, refuse to wear brightly-colored uniforms and march in a straight line. No replacement can be found. The French judge declares a win for the Americans (after a hefty bribe).
THE OUTCOME: The British go home, have a cup of tea and sulk about their newly-discovered inferiority complex. The Americans decide that they are immortal.

THE MATCH: Prime Minister Winston Churchill VERSUS Der Fuhrer, Adolf Hitler
THE PLAY: Winston and Adolf play football (that's soccar, to you Americans). Hitler commits suicide after overextending his reach without adequate defense, and his body is immediately eaten by a pack of rabid Manchester United fans.
THE OUTCOME: Winston has a cigar.

AND

THE MATCH: President Harry Truman VERSUS Emperor Hirohito of Nippon
THE PLAY: Truman, in our reality, ordered two Japanese cities to be vaporized. Hirohito was mostly interested in fish, between bouts of world domination. Since Truman was the challenged party, he got to choose how the duel would be fought. "Projectile weapons", he says. Hirohito agrees and goes to get his pistol. Meanwhile, former field artillery captain Truman directs the offshore bombardment of the dueling ground from the safety of the bridge of a battleship.
THE OUTCOME: The Americans win because they have bigger guns. Everyone agrees except for the Japanese, who tell their children that the match was a draw because the Americans didn't play fair.

THE MATCH: President John F. Kennedy VERSUS Soviet Premier Nikita Khruschev
THE PLAY: Premier Khruschev beats Kennedy to death with his shoes.
THE OUTCOME: The Soviets win the Cold War, but their economy collapses before they can take over the NATO bloc.

THE MATCH: President Richard Nixon VERSUS Hoh Chi Minh
THE PLAY: Nixon and Hoh Chi Minh have a sparring match. Hoh Chi Minh beats the crap out of Nixon, since he's a hardcore revolutionary martial artist, but Nixon keeps getting up and going back for more, until finally he loses consciousness and has to be dragged out of the ring by the Democratic Party.
THE OUTCOME: The Vietnamese get to just do their thing, and the Americans go home in shame.

THE MATCH: President Bush the First versus President Saddam Hussein
THE PLAY: Saddam challenges Bush the First to a game of hide-and-seek in the desert. Despite air-dropped supplies and a GPS navigation system, Bush never does find Saddam.
THE OUTCOME: Driven mad by his master's defeat, General Norman Schwartzkopf bombs the hell out of Iraq anyway, while the rest of the world screams in protest. Saddam lives to fight Gulf War II against Bush the Second.

THE MATCH: President Bill Clinton VERSUS President Slobodan Milosevic of Serbia
THE PLAY: Solobodan fights Bill in a Serbian mass graveyard at midnight. As they shake hands before the fight, Bill keels over because of the contact poison Slobodan put on his glove. Slobodan buries Bill in the grave, and later claims that Bill never showed.
THE OUTCOME: An investigation run by the Duel Crimes Tribunal at The Hague uncovers Slobodan's treachery. He goes to jail, and the Americans bomb the hell out of Serbia.

THE MATCH: President Bush the Second VERSUS Osama bin Laden
THE PLAY: Bush and bin Laden try to hunt each other down in a mountain pass in Afghanistan. Bush gets lost and ends up in Iraq.
THE OUTCOME: Bush mistakes Iraq for Afghanistan, and orders the American Air Force to bomb it anyway. Bush kills Saddam, but the judges rule the move illegal, and the Americans are forced to make reparations. Bush says that the judges must be in league with the Taliban.
Typing

On The Naming Of Frank

(*original link posted by squishybear*)

Frank Prevatt:
The Boy's Name Frank is shared by ~783,000 people in the USA.
The Last Name Prevatt is shared by ~830 people in the USA.
The First_Name + Last_Name Frank Prevatt is not common in the US, with a shared population of around 0 - 10 individuals.
The First Name, Last Initial Frank P is shared by ~20,100 people in the USA.
The First Initial, Last Name F Prevatt is shared by ~10 people in the USA.
(considering me and my Dad are both Frank Prevatt, I wanna find the other eight of them)

Here's the part I got a kick out of:
FrankPrevatt.com -- Domain Available
FrankPrevatt.net -- Domain Available
FrankPrevatt.org -- Domain Available
FrankPrevatt.info -- Domain Available
FrankPrevatt.us -- Domain Available
FrankPrevatt.co.uk -- Domain Not Available
FrankPrevatt.me.uk -- Domain Not Available
FrankPrevatt.org.uk -- Domain Not Available
FrankPrevatt.co.nz -- Domain Available
FrankPrevatt.net.nz -- Domain Available
FrankPrevatt.gen.nz -- Domain Available
FrankPrevatt.maori.nz -- Domain Available

OK, there's one of them, in the UK...and I found another one...man, wish this one was me...

Only six more to find.
Typing

Zen Comedy

Di told me earlier that I had her laughin all day. Funny, I thought, since i barely talked to her most of the day. She went on to inform me that I don't have to say or type anything, I don't have to be online, I don't even have to be there.

Not bad, I thought to myself, smugly. I can get her laugh without even presence or mention. The true Zen Comedy. Fear my mad leet Zen Laughter Skillz.
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