Point two: I would have gone in for orientation tomorrow, but this afternoon I received a phone call about a resume I had thought long since ignored. While the job doesn't pay any more (in fact, it's a little less per hour), it'd be full-time work, and not at a place that makes me loathe to speak its name (you may have noticed that part...). This means more money in the end, and bennies (I assume). This means it's a better option, over all.
So, I go Thursday to see if I can land the job. Meanwhile, I talked to the first job, and they agreed to hold my position open for one week, so if the interview goes badly, I still have the job on which to fall back. Not too shabby, eh?
Man, this has all been weird, and has made me think about some aspects of my life that I have pointedly ignored for a long time. It hasn't all been good, but the end result should be worth it.
Edited to add detail