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07 October 2002 @ 02:14 pm
I just got off the phone with my Dad. I really don't talk to him enough, but neither one of us is the "call up and chat" kinda person, and we have such different lives that even when we do, it's never a long call. Still, I miss him, he's a great guy, and for all his faults, he has alweays been there for me, tried to help, tried to teach me and show me what I needed, has always been a 'father' as well as 'dad'.

Anyway, he tells me that he finally saw a doctor about his back problems, and the doc told him that it looks like he broke his back at some point in his life and it never healed properly. He's got some exercises that he is supposed to be doing, to try and strengthen it, but he hasn't been. I told him to do them, or else I'd come kick his ass, and it was a joke, but he responded with "well, if that's what it takes for me to see you...". Man, I choked. I didn't have a response to that.

I suppose it's one of those cliche things you hear, that you don't really appreciate them until they aren't around, and it's not totally true, since as far as I'm concerned, my mom can still go take a flying leap off a cliff. I actually wish we lived closer together. A year ago, I got to see him for the first time in 5 years, and I have no idea when I'll see him next.

I proudly carry his name as my own. I'd take a bullet for my Dad.
Current Music: Filter - One
zombiedip on October 7th, 2002 02:27 pm (UTC)
God of Thunder and Rock'n'Roll: Tigerarchmage on October 7th, 2002 03:12 pm (UTC)
Gary Sinise Groupiehellbot13 on October 8th, 2002 05:59 am (UTC)
Totally off of the subject... but that pic is sooo cute! My fav of all I've seen! Y'all look sweet together!
zombiedip on October 8th, 2002 08:46 am (UTC)
Re: AAAWWWW!!!!!
thx ... we try to spread the diabetic shock everywhere we can *G*
God of Thunder and Rock'n'Rollarchmage on October 8th, 2002 08:50 am (UTC)
Re: AAAWWWW!!!!!
*G*...it's from the first pictures ever taken of us. Aren't we just sugary sweet?
Jahnjijahnji on October 7th, 2002 02:31 pm (UTC)
I am honored to be named after my grandfather, since he gave his life to save his family. :)
God of Thunder and Rock'n'Roll: Burn Them Allarchmage on October 7th, 2002 03:12 pm (UTC)
Very cool. A legacy is an honor, indeed.
ratspikeratspike on October 7th, 2002 06:22 pm (UTC)
It may be a cliche but it's also painfully true. It's been almost 10 years now since my father died and I really resent the fact that I never got to have an adult relationship with him. I think about the things I've accomplished since his passing and really wish I could tell him about all of it. My father was a lot of things and while he had his faults just like anyone else, he was one of the few genuinely good men I've ever known. I still take a lot of pride in the things he did while he was around...he gave the Marine Corps 20 years of service, he worked hard his entire life, he was good to his kids and to other people. He was forunate enough to spend the last 10 or so years of his life as a successful furniture builder, something he loved doing, in a quiet little town out in the Gorge. At his memorial, which I wasn't able to attend, many people spoke highly of him. A life well lived, though not long enough.

I learned a lot from him during the few short years when we'd finally begun to build not only a solid relationship but a friendship as well. As long as I live I'll never forget the last conversation I had with him...he called to let me know he was gonna be in town and did I want to get together? I'd been working a lot and was dead tired but tried to insist we do something anyway. He said not to sweat it, and we'd do it on his next trip into Portland. He died a few days later.

It was several years before I really started to realize what I was going to miss out on. At the time he died I was sitll a dumbshit 20-something who was too busy being angsty to worry about building a real life for myself. As I got older, started a business, got married, began to see some marginal success as an artist and accomplished some other pretty cool stuff...those were the times that I missed him the most. Like you, I couldn't give two shits about my mother and have less than no interest in sharing my life with the likes of her. But goddammit, my old man would have been pretty proud of me. I truly believe that every positive trait I have came from my father. I see a lot of him in myself and I know without a doubt that if we'd been given more time we'd be the best of friends.

I'm genuinely happy for you bro. Being able to have a solid, man to man relationship with your dad is priceless.
My Life As A Military Wife & Mother: Mebabyinga on October 7th, 2002 06:27 pm (UTC)
Damn that nearly brought a tear to my eye! It made me remember my grandmother and how very much I miss her and how badly I treated her before running away from home. She passed on Christmas afternoon of 1994. :o( Anyways, like you I've made amends with my dad through the years even though he beat me and treated me like shit for years when I was younger. As far as my mom is concerned I don't give much care for her. She is the stupid bitch that walked out on my dad and I when I was frigging 3 years old. Grrrrrrr Yes there is a lot of resentment there. I sure hope you get to see your dad soon! *hugs*
Gary Sinise Groupiehellbot13 on October 8th, 2002 05:57 am (UTC)
*pout* *sniff*
~Jojo~jobunches on October 8th, 2002 12:34 pm (UTC)

I think that I will go call Dad and tell him how much I love him.
God of Thunder and Rock'n'Rollarchmage on October 8th, 2002 02:01 pm (UTC)
Good move.