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09 July 2003 @ 09:37 am
It's Pun Time Again!  
I swear, savrille and I get into the weirdest conversations...and we just can't seem to stop...

savrille: You violated my fresh vegetable. Prepare to meat your breadmaker.
archmage: You carrot do that to me! It was the onion guy!
archmage: Besides, that's just not rye.
savrille: Once a cook, always a cook. Bake'em Danno.
archmage: Shake me down, will ya?
archmage: Fine, throw me in a celery.
savrille: Lettuce get to the point. I'm gonna radichio until you pop the crackers, see?
archmage: I'm no ratatouille.
savrille: Oh, you'll be flapping that pie hole of yours soon enough.
archmage: Bake me over the coals all you want, flatfoot. I'll be a tough nut to crack.
savrille: You think I'm just a cupcake? We've got a blender, see, and we're not afraid to use it!
archmage: Eh, you can sit there and simmer all you want. Your threats slide right off my non-stick surface.
savrille: Teflon coated, eh? We'll see how you stand up to a high heat. I bet you start peeling left and right.
archmage: I can take whatever you can dish out. Go ahead and TRY to fillet me.
savrille: Alright. You asked for it.
* savrille gets out Louie "The Toaster" Spignolli.
archmage: Ha, the joke's on you. The Italians are on MY side.
archmage: The family always makes sure we're well-fed
savrille: Actually, you're the one with egg on his face. Louie *hated* his parents, and after he waxed the both of them, he came to work for us.
archmage: Yeah, I know about that...but if he touches me, he'll DEFINITELY be in the soup. They'll turn him into chunky salsa.
savrille: Now you've done it. He *hates* tomato-based products.
archmage: Yeah, but he knows the recipe. Unless he wants to sleep with the fishes, he'll go to low heat.
archmage: Now I know where you're comin' from, cop, you got a lot of mouths to feed...maybe you want a juicy tidbit on a REAL morsel.
savrille: You got a lot of dry muffins, get to the moist center or we drop the rolling pin.
archmage: Maybe you want to take a REAL bite out of crime...and maybe, just maybe, you'd like to lock up Garibaldi's top biscuits.
savrille: Garibaldi, eh? Keep simmerin'...
archmage: And maybe I just happen to know his secret blend of herbs and spices, and where he keeps his sugar.
savrille: Tell you what, kumquat, You spill the beans on the secret herbs and spices, and I make your lunch disappear, just like it's never been served, see?
savrille: Or, you can find out what a puree feels like.
archmage: And what guarantee do I have that you aren't waiting around the corner with a frying pan?
savrille: You don't. But isn't better to take a chance on the frying pan that may not be there, or the Toaster thats right in front of you?
archmage: Psssshhh...your stirring the worng pot with me, gumshoe. But I'm willing to deal a meal that'll help us both.
savrille: You wanna drop a few dumplings in the pot, you go ahead. But I'm gonna see what it tastes like before I pay for the batch, see?
archmage: Well, I might be able to give you a little nibble, sure. You remember the shooting of Joey "Meatball" Garibaldi?
savrille: Yea, he lost his motza balls in that one.
archmage: Except that was just the icing. Meatball is still alive. It was staged to keep him outta hot water.
savrille: Meatball wasn't boiled?
savrille: Then where's the sauce?
archmage: On, no you don't. That information comes only after the oven door is open.
archmage: Along with some more tasty tidbits.
savrille: Alright then. What's a slow roll and boil gonna go for?
archmage: I walk, and you forget all about my little spill...and in return, you get info you can REALLY sink your teeth into.
savrille: Alright. You get the run of the garden, *IF* I like the salad. Make with the fry, daddy.
archmage: Meatball is still toasting his marshmallows at Garibaldi's private breakfast nook. Garibaldi don't let him out much because he's afraid too many cooks'll spoil the stew.
archmage: However, Meatball can't resist those little pastries he used to get down at Valentino's, and sifts his way up there every few nights.
savrille: Good, I'll send the boys out to cool their heels till he pops up.
archmage: Now, as for Garibaldi...that info comes your way when I'm back in the carrot patch.
archmage: But you'll be hauling him here in a potato sack within a week.
* savrille pulls out a gun.
savrille: I think I'll be taking that recipe, now.
savrille: *BLAM*
savrille: whoops.
archmage: 'Fraid not, buster. I'm wired like a Christmas turkey, and that info just got recorded...the shot too. Let me walk, and your rep is clean as my kitchen.
savrille: It was almost an accident in the kitchen. this time, I'll aim a little better.
savrille: *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM*
savrille: whoops.
archmage: LMAO...and how long did we manage to keep up this punfest?
savrille: 30 minutes or more..
savrille: I dunno. I was working at the same time..
 
 
Current Music: Punk Cover - Theme From 'The Pink Panther'
 
 
 
wesa on July 9th, 2003 09:51 am (UTC)
i wasn't expecting so much length! i bow before you two.
God of Thunder and Rock'n'Rollarchmage on July 9th, 2003 10:43 am (UTC)
Re:
i wasn't expecting so much length
Yeah, women say that to me a lot...:P...j/k...

When we get going, there's no stopping us. ;)
Just a Girl: Deathsandmansister on July 9th, 2003 09:53 am (UTC)
Bwaa ha ha ha!
That's the first full-on laugh I've had in days... thanks for sharing! It's truly beautiful. *wipes away tears*

At least you didn't delve into cheeses; the possibilities there are frightening (i.e. not gouda). No really! I camembert it!
God of Thunder and Rock'n'Rollarchmage on July 9th, 2003 10:47 am (UTC)
Re: Bwaa ha ha ha!
Well, I'd rather you laugh than feel bleu. But, if you feta like it, I could jack a few for you. But you'd cheddar be sure, because I'm not gonna drag them all out, just to have you claim they're nacho desires. I mean, Edam! That'd hurt worse than fighting a gorgonzola.

Fuck it, I'm hungry...time for a limburger.

;)
Just a Girl: Vampsandmansister on July 9th, 2003 12:48 pm (UTC)
Re: Bwaa ha ha ha!
Hope your lunch was satisfactory. I bet you’re a real Munster when your blood sugar crashes. You’re probably ready to kick my Asiago. Colby quite ugly. I’d have to make a quick getaway in a Mascarpone. But you know I think you’re the Chevre; I’d never Stilton you.
God of Thunder and Rock'n'Roll: The Mask (Laughing)archmage on July 9th, 2003 03:25 pm (UTC)
Re: Bwaa ha ha ha!
Aw, thank you, I couldn't Brie more honored at your comments. But perhaps we should be Ridder of this convo...otherwise we could be playing Doolin puns all day. Besides, Halloumi cheeses can we really think of? We keep this up and we're just making a Raclette.
Amanda M.tigerlady1974 on July 9th, 2003 10:56 am (UTC)
*snickering*
Loved it - Writewench sent her other LJ buds over here to check it out.... too funny! I liked the cheese comments too...

Very Punny...thanks for sharing.

-Tigerlady1974
God of Thunder and Rock'n'Rollarchmage on July 9th, 2003 11:08 am (UTC)
Re: *snickering*
Glad it brought a smile!
lilinchylde on July 9th, 2003 11:51 am (UTC)

heheheeeeeeeeee *snarf*

nichole misoryevilchick69 on July 9th, 2003 12:14 pm (UTC)
wow i like your lj..i can't get mine cool.. okay this might be an odd question, but i was looking for h r giger icons and there was a link to your lj.. so by any chance you know where i can find some eh???
God of Thunder and Rock'n'Rollarchmage on July 9th, 2003 03:16 pm (UTC)
Re:
Well, I don't have any idea where to FIND any, but I'd be happy to MAKE you some.