God of Thunder and Rock'n'Roll (archmage) wrote,
God of Thunder and Rock'n'Roll
archmage

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Friends?

So, I have a ticket for tomorrow night's Dark Lotus show. I was really geared up to go...and now, as the time for the show is upon me, I find that I simply don't care anymore. I've dropped posts in both vancouverwa and damnportlanders, hoping someone will buy it off of me. Come on, has to be SOMEONE in the area that wants to go to the show, right?

Not sure what changed my mind. I'm sure part of it is nto having someone to go to the a show WITH. I dunno, it's just not as much fun for me to see any show alone, you know? If the show is someone that I really like, one of my faves, then I'd go anyway, fine...but even then, I won't enjoy it as much as I would if someone shared it. Sadly, this just leads me back to the fact that I just don't have the kind of friends that I once did. I have friends, of course, don't get me wrong. But they are acquaintences, just people I know. They aren't actually that much like me, it seems; we have different ideas of fun.

I don't think any less of any of them, and this isn't something meant to belittle them or put them down in any way. It's just that there was a time, not long ago, that i had a group of friends, we saw each other very often (sometimes every day), we liked the same things, we did things together, and we trusted each other like bretheren. We were true, close, best friends. We were always there for each other, though thin and flush, and dammit, we meant something to each other. We all had similarities that brought us together, and we had differences that gave each of us a special place in the order of things.

There have been a couple, over the last few years, that were like that...and then they moved away. Sometimes i think I'm getting close to someone like that again, and I always seem to find that, no, I was wrong. I'd give almost anything for just one friend like that, again.
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